Yo conozco a gente así

[T]he protagonist was guilty of several things, and so was her mother. However, instead of owning up to their guilt in specific matters and attempting restitution they adopted guilt as a character trait, having insufficient self knowledge to deal in a rational way with the consequences of their actions.

This is really worth considering.




Filed under Theories

2 responses to “Yo conozco a gente así

  1. This means identifying what we have done and coming clean about it and making it up to the offended parties, and I have got to confess to being less than pure in that regard. It’s hard. Almost easier to identify oneself as a guilty but mostly wronged person.

    • Z

      It is really common, though, and you have articulated it so clearly. I think this is a reason why many people I know suffer to the degree they do.

      I have found it is not always a good strategy to let people know you think in this way (the recommended way), though: they find it weak. If you are willing to cop to one fault, then there must be much more, or they must be able to get you to concede even more. I have often found that when I do this, people think I must be play-acting, it is politically correct but nobody could actually do it for real. When one does this one has to also be very, very firm. People who present themselves as generally guilty but mostly wronged often get further ahead in life, I have noticed, although they also suffer more.

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