I will order books from Interlibrary Loan. I will finish my Peruvian abstract and make the plane reservation. I will work more on my vita. I have enough to say to fill several books.

I will go to the Home Depot and buy eight concrete blocks, each four inches high. I will repair shoes, and go to the cleaner. I will buy other shoes for formal work situations, I will have other formal work clothes ready, and I am a great bourgeoise.

I will visit two stores on Magazine Street and one on Chartres. I will apply to certain Fullbrights and the Stanford Humanities Center. The department cannot spare me, the university cannot supplement my stipend, the house cannot be rented, and I have bills these stipends will not pay.

I will apply nonetheless. I will discover the exact minimum supplement I need, and insist upon it, if I am actually awarded any of these things. I will stop thinking I cannot ask. I declined a Fulbright and a book contract years ago because I assumed I could not ask for what I needed.

I still wish I had gone to law school when I first came up with the idea.

In the meantime I will grade again, prepare classes and class websites massively, walk again, and call the Brazilian again. I will reserve a room in Houston and see what to do about that coat, which is separated from me but not lost. I have another plane ticket to think about.

It goes to France on a Turkish airline and I will spend two nights in Istanbul, then fly on to Paris in the middle of the day, get directly onto the TGV Chalon-sur-Saône. Later I will return the same way, spending another few nights in Istanbul. I have places to stay in these cities.

I want to buy that bed frame and that ticket but they seem like big jumps. I would like to wait, yet do not want these things to get away from me. And if I am going to buy clothes and move, I do not necessarily want to acquire the bed frame now.



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